Love is a human nature. Love is also a form of perfection of creation that God has given to man. God graced human heart with feelings of love in many ways. One of them is the love of a man to a woman, and vice versa.
Love can be a boon if luapkan accordance with the divine values frame. However, the feeling of love can bring people to the brink of disgrace when diumbar controlled for sheer pleasure and wild lust.
Islam as a perfect law, provide corridors for the distribution of this nature. Moreover, tough love is one of the energy that could perpetuate the relationship of a man and woman in real life household. Therefore, a righteous man can not be the origin in selecting a woman to be his companion.
There are many factors that could be because the appearance of a man's love for a woman to diperistri. At least as below.
1. Because of his belief that Shahih
Family is one of the strongholds creed. As the fort faith, family must be really solid and impenetrable. If fragile, it devastated everything and all family members are unlikely to survive the world-the afterlife. And the important factors that can help a man maintain the robustness of the castle household is the wife shalihah berakidah authentic and well aware of the role and function as a madrasa for potential leaders of the next generation.
God assures this in His words, "And do not marry polytheistic women until they believe. Verily a believing slave woman is better than polytheistic women, although she drew hearts. And do not marry idolaters (with the women believers) before they believe. Verily a believing slave is better than the idolaters, even though she pulls your heart. They invite to the Fire, but Allah invites to Paradise and forgiveness by His leave. And Allah explains His verses (His commandments) to mankind that they may take heed. "(Al-Baqarah: 221)
2. Because understanding of the religion and practice it
There are many things that make a man love a woman. There are as kemolekannya alone. There is also because of their social status. Not a few men marry a woman because she is rich. But, said the Prophet is the lucky man who gets women jurists in matters of religion. That's a woman's dream that righteous man.
From Abu Hurairah, the Messenger of Allah. said, "Women married for four cases: because of his wealth, his descendants, her beauty, and her religion. So, take a woman who has a religion (female shalihah), you will be lucky. "(Bukhari and Muslim)
Prophet. also asserted, "The world is jewelry, and jewelry is the world's most well shalihah woman." (Muslim, Ibn Majah, and Nasa'i).
So, not only men who do not love a woman mindless shalihah.
3. Of good offspring
Prophet. warned the righteous man not to marry native women. "Stay away from junk green grass!" They asked, "Is the grass green waste, O Messenger of Allah?" The Prophet replied, "A good woman but living in a bad place." (Daruquthni, Askari, and Ibn 'Adi)
Hence the Prophet. provide guidance to the faithful men to be selective in looking for his wife. Not only have to find a woman who lived in a good place, but also have an uncle and brothers are good quality. "Choose the best for you guys cum-cum, and marry people who are worth (the women) and marry (your women) to their (male equivalent)," said the Prophet. (Ibn Majah, Daruquthni, Hakim, and Bayhaqi).
"Look for places that are good enough for the seeds you, as a man might resemble his uncles," so the command of the Prophet. again. "Marry in the" room "the righteous, because of the temperament of the parents (offspring) was decreased to the child." (Ibn 'Adi)
Therefore, Uthman ibn Abi al-'Ash Ats-Thaqafi advise their children to choose a good seed and avoid the ugly offspring. "O my son, the marriage is like a plant person. But let someone see the first place planting. The ugly offspring rarely spawned (child), then choose good although a bit old. "
4. Was a girl
Anyone know, girls who have never married still has the properties of a woman's natural. Full of shame, in the language and speak sweet, spoiled, fear of making treasonous, and there was never any feeling in her bonds. Love of a girl is more pure because it is never shared with anyone else, except her husband.
Because of this, the Messenger of Allah. advocate married to the girl. "Let the girl you marry, because he said they are sweeter, easier to have children, a little more room and a little more receptive," as word of the Prophet, narrated by Ibn Majah and Bayhaqi.
On this A'ishah never ask directly to the Prophet. "O Messenger of Allah, what do you think if you go down in a valley and the valley there is a tree that has not been grazed, and some trees that had been grazed; where you will feed your camel?" The Prophet replied, "In the never grazed. "Then A'ishah said," That's me. "
Marry a virgin would bear a strong love and strengthen defense and sanctity. However, under certain circumstances marry a widow sometimes better than marrying a girl. This happened in the case of a friend named Jabir.
Prophet. Essence of War after al-Riqa asked Jabir, "O Jabir, have you married?" Jabir replied, "Yes, O Messenger of Allah." he asked, "widow or virgin?" Jabir replied, "Widow." he said, " Why did not the girl that you are able to intimate with him? "Jabir replied," O Messenger of Allah, my father actually slain Uhud and left seven daughters. That's why I married a woman who can take care of them. "The Prophet said," You're right, God willing. "
5. Sound mind and compassionate
Companions Ma'qal bin Yasar said, "A man came to the Prophet PBUH. and said, "Behold, I found a good and beautiful woman, but she could not give birth. Should I marry her? "He replied," Never. "Then he was facing the Prophet. for the second time, and it turns Prophet. still prevent it. Then he came for the third time, the Prophet. said, "Marry women who are many children, for indeed I will boast of the large number of guys in front of other peoples." (Abu Dawud and Nasa'i).
Therefore, the Prophet asserted, "Marry women who are fertile and loving. Because I'm real proud of the guys from many other people. "(Abu Dawud and An-Nasa'i)
6. Noble
Abu Hasan al-Mawardi in the Book of Advice Al-Muluk quoted Umar bin Khattab about choosing a good wife is the right of the child to his father, "The right of a child who first of all is to get a mother who, at its option, choose the woman who will give birth. That is a woman who has beauty, noble, religious, maintaining holiness, clever set of household affairs, noble, has a good mentality and perfect and obey her husband in all circumstances. "
7. Meek
Imam Ahmad narrated the hadith of A'ishah ra that the Messenger of Allah. said, "O 'A'ishah, being weak gentle, because Allah willed it if kindness to a family, then God showed them to the gentle nature of this valley." In another narration, "If God wills something good in a family, then God's gentle nature put into them. "
8. Soothing views
Prophet. said, "Did not want me to inform you about the best thing on a woman? (Ie) shalihah woman is a woman who when seen by her husband's delight, if he obeyed orders, and if he left her she keep herself and her husband's property. "(Abu Dawud and An-Nasa'i)
"Truly the best of your women is childless, big love, the holder of the secret, the family's tough-minded, obedient to her husband, dandy for him, guard against another man, obedient to her husband's words and commands and when alone with her husband pasrahkan himself to her husband's will and does not apply as against her husband as a man, "said the Prophet. again.
So no wonder if Asma 'bint Khārijah bequeath to his daughter a few things are about to get married. "You will get out of life in which there are no offspring. You will go to bed, where we do not recognize and friends who do not necessarily love. Be ye like the earth for your husband, then he is like the sky. Be ye as ground for him, then he will be a buffer for you. Be ye in front of her as female slaves, then he will be a servant to you. Do you cover yourself from him, consequently he could throw. Nor should you stay away from that could cause it to forget. If he came to you, then you should be mengakrabinya. If he is away, then you ought to stay away from him. We do not vote except in the case of the good stuff alone. And do not listen to it unless you listen well and you do not see it except with a view of the remedy. "
9. Realistic in demanding rights and obligations
One merit of a woman who loved a man worth Salih is qana'a. Not only qana'a for any provision that God has set in the Qur'an, but also in receiving delivery qana'a husband. "The best is when the wife is given, he is grateful, and if not given, he is patient. You look at him and he's happy to be obedient when you told him. "Because it's no wonder that her husband often took off in front of the door to go in search of sustenance, they said," Do you make a living out of illicit goods, but we are still able to starve, but we not able to withstand the heat of the fire inferno. "
Prophet said, "The most blessed wife is the least cost." (Ahmad, Al-Hakim, and Bayhaqi from A'ishah ra)
But, "The woman has the right as they have obligations under the propriety and fairness," so the word of Allah swt. in surah Al-Baqarah verse 228. The services provided by his wife and living comparable with the assurance given him. God's command to the husband, "Give place to live for women like you occupy. Do not you hurt them with the intention of pressing. "(At-THALAQ: 6)
10. Helping husbands and encourage families to be cautious
Shalihah wife is a real treasure of savings that we can make savings in the world and the hereafter. Faith Tsauban Tirmidhi narrated that the companions said, "When it comes down verse 'walladzina yaknizuna ... (people who store gold and silver as well as not menafkahkannya in the way of Allah), we were with the Messenger of Allah. on a journey. Then, some of the companions said, "This verse down on gold and silver. Suppose we know there are better possession, of course we will take ". Prophet. then said, "What is more significant is that it is the dhikr of the tongue, a thankful heart, and wife shalihah which will help to maintain the faith of a believer."
11. Understand the advantages and shortcomings of her husband
Nailah bint Al-Al-Kalbiyah Fafishah is a young girl who married families with Uthman ibn Affan who was about 80 years old. When Uthman was asked, "Are you happy with this ketuaanku?" "I am a woman who likes men with ketuaannya," said Nailah. "But this ketuaanku too frail." Nailah replied, "You have spent your youth with the Messenger of Allah. and I love it more than anything else. "
12. Clever grateful to husband
Prophet. said, "Allah will not look for a wife who is not grateful (thank you) to her husband, when he most needed it." (An-Nasa'i).
13. Intelligent and wise in the expression
Who does not like the wise women like Umm Salamah? After Hudhaibiyah Agreement was signed, the Messenger of Allah. ordered his companions to bertahallul, slaughtering goats, and shave, then prepare a camel to go back home to Medina. However, the sabahat not respond to commands it because it was disappointed with the agreement that seemed to harm the Muslims.
Prophet. met Umm Salama and said, "Muslims have been corrupted, O Umm Salamah. I ordered them, but they do not want to follow. "
With intelligence in analyzing the incident, Umm Salamah eloquently expressing his opinion and wise, "O Messenger of Allah, in the presence of those Acts is a good example and role model. Exit the Apostles, met them, gifts as goats, and shave. I have no doubt that they will follow the Prophet and imitate what the Apostle did. "
Subhan Allah, Umm Salamah true. Rasulullah out, shave, slaughtering goats, and took off ihram clothes. The companions of the Prophet imitate what do. This is the blessing of intelligent and wise woman in expression. Women like these that deserve the love of a righteous man....
